Category Archives: Uncategorized

Running up that hill

Posted on April 14, 2019 by

Trigger warning: this post contains descriptions of suicidal thoughts, including methods. Please don’t read on if you are feeling at all vulnerable. I want to run. I am desperate to run. When I wrote my last post my idea was … Continue reading →

Posted in Bipolar, Crisis care, GP, Mental health, Mental health services, Mood disorder, Suicidal thought, Suicide, Treatment planning, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , ,

Hospital at home

Posted on April 6, 2019 by

Trigger warning: suicidal thoughts and planning A depressing side effect of being a seasoned blogger with a fluctuating condition is that the archive makes it very clear that I go around and around, having better times, then having groundhog day … Continue reading →

Posted in Bipolar, Crisis care, GP, Hospital, Inpatient care, Mental health, Mental health services, Mixed mood, Mood disorder, NHS services, Rapid cycling, Suicidal thought, Suicide, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

On having a “carer”

Posted on April 4, 2019 by

By now I am a veteran at completing application/review forms for Employment and Support Allowance (ESA) and Personal Independence Payment (PIP). ESA is for people who are too sick to work, while PIP is to cover extra expenses associated with … Continue reading →

Posted in Anxiety, Bipolar, Crisis care, Depression, Employment and benefits, GP, Medication, Mental health, Mental health services, Mood disorder, NHS services, Rapid cycling, Suicidal thought, Treatment planning, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , ,

These are not the little things: unsanitary conditions on mental health wards

Posted on March 21, 2019 by

Today I got angry after reading a tweet. Just a regular day then, you might think, except this one made me so angry I have had to blog for the first time in months. I was reading a thread about … Continue reading →

Posted in Hospital, Inpatient care, Mental health, Mental health services, NHS services, Psychiatry, Social media, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , ,

Christmas approaches

Posted on December 3, 2018 by

It’s been a long time since I posted. I just don’t feel the urge as much these days; I’ve become habituated to things like hospitalisation and crisis care, therapy and medication changes, so although these things continue to play a … Continue reading →

Posted in Bipolar, Christmas, Crisis care, Depression, Employment and benefits, exercise, Hospital, Hypomania, Inpatient care, Medication, Mental health, Mental health services, Mixed mood, Mood disorder, NHS services, psychology, Self-management, Therapy, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

The pam fam: the demonisation of benzodiazepines

Posted on September 13, 2018 by

“Diazepam.” A single word tweet. Regular readers or Twitter followers will know what that meant: I had hit an intolerable level of anxiety which I was managing with a prescribed benzodiazepine. One which I am not only authorised but encouraged … Continue reading →

Posted in Bipolar, CBT, Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, Depression, Hypomania, Mental health, Mental health services, Mixed mood, Mood disorder, NHS services, Pillshaming, Primary care, Psychiatry, Rapid cycling, Self-management, Social media, Stigma and discrimination, Suicide, Treatment planning, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Roll with it

Posted on August 19, 2018 by

This morning I managed to shave my legs. It’s the closest to achieving anything that I have reached in days. Because here am I, depressed again. I’m kind of waiting for my CPN (Community Psychiatric Nurse) to say “I told … Continue reading →

Posted in Bipolar, Depression, Mental health, Mood disorder, Rapid cycling, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , ,